| Azriela Jaffe is the founder of "Anchored
Dreams" and author of "Honey, I Want to Start my Own Business,
A
Planning Guide for Couples" ( Harper Business 1996), and "Let's
Go Into Business Together, Eight Secrets for Successful Business Partnering"
(Avon
Books 1998) and "Starting from No, Ten Strategies to Overcome Your Fear
of Rejection and Succeed in Business" (Dearborn April 1999).
Experts say that the most vulnerable time in a marriage is years 5-7,
when the romance has generally faded and the couple is immersed in the
power
struggles that emerge in every marriage. With hard work and commitment,
that couple can work through the disenchantment and anger of these times
and create a more lasting, and ultimately satisfying, love. It is
no coincidence that your marriage is more vulnerable to an affair during
this period of time. Just when you have come to loathe the idiosyncracies
of your spouse, you meet up with someone who seems to have none of these
annoying habits - the grass starts looking greener somewhere else.
Business owners go through cycles in their business, too. After
several
years of working hard at the business, if you haven't achieved your
financial goals, if the work has become boring and routine, if you
are
tired of customer complaints, long hours, working from home,or whatever
dissatisfactions your business holds, you may start feeling the itch to
look elsewhere. That's normal, and may even be good for your
business. As you'll see from the following story, leaving your business
for a period of time may rejuvenate you, much as a separation in a marriage
can reignite the love that was forgotten.
Karen is a Lancaster, PA business owner who spoke candidly with me about
this issue, but asked for anonymity. She has been running her own
business from home for seven years, while raising her daughters, now pre-teens.
I met Karen because my family is a consumer of the product she sells.
During our most recent conversation, she acknowledged a major shift in
her business in the last year that arose, ironically, out of her decision
to stop working the business. Karen shares:
"When I first started using the products (that she sells), I never intended
to do it as a business. Two years after taking the products, I decided
to
do it as a business part-time, as a way for me to pay for my own product.
As the business started to grow, I realized it was a way for me to
stay
home with the kids as they grew up, instead of looking elsewhere for
a job. I loved the business for several years, but then I lost my
passion for it. I thought people in my organization weren't listening
to me the way they used to and I became very frustrated. After thirteen
years of being home with my kids, I was tired of working from home.
I felt a need to dress up, interview, talk to people and see what is going
on in the workplace.
I put together a resume, which honestly looked pretty chatty and funny,
and I went on several job interviews with personnel agencies and companies.
I told my organization of 100 people that I would be leaving the business
for awhile, though I'd still be using the products as a consumer.
I got rid of all my business materials. It was a complete break for
me.
I quickly found out that I wasn't qualified for a lot of jobs. What
I love
most is sales and marketing but every sales job I interviewed for involved
a lot of travel. I was used to being available every day for my kids
when
they returned home from school, and getting them ready for school in
the
morning. I wasn't sure that they, or I, was ready for me to be
gone for
full days.
The more I went on job interviews, the better my business started to
look. In my own business, I can work without any time constraints
on where I have to be at any set time. I choose what when I meet
with people and when I call them on the phone based on the kids' schedules.
I didn't want to miss waiting at the corner when school gets out for my
youngest daughter. I wanted to be home for my eighth grader when
she comes home from school, even if she's only home for ten minutes.
The 6 dollar an hour jobs I could find weren't worth the sacrifice of not
being with my kids. The sales commission positions I could take involved
travel, which not only would take me away from home too much, but would
necessitate us buying me a car. (Right now we manage fine with one
car because my husband is self-employed and can walk to his office).
After being away from the business for about six months, I started looking
at my business with new eyes. Suddenly it looked great to me. I realized
that I could create what I wanted, and that all along the only thing
stopping me was me. It may not have health insurance or a weekly
salary, but what it does have is are the choices I need to be able to work
and take care of my family. At the same time, my husband's business
started generating more income, which took away some of the pressure I
was feeling to get a job. I went back to my business and started
growing it again with renewed passion."
Nothing changed about Karen's business while she was gone. The
love for her business was reignited by stepping away and realizing the
benefits she had come to take for granted. She needed to look elsewhere
in order to fall in love with her business once again.
If you find yourself in a rut, or if your business is making you feel
grouchy on a daily basis, it may behoove you to put some distance between
you and your business for a period of time. Take a part-time job
or work on a temporary assignment. Taking a break will either confirm for
you that it's time to move on to something new, or it might, like Karen,
remind you that the grass is actually greenest in your own backyard.
|